Good things come to those that wait...

Don't you just hate that saying!  I don't know about you but waiting doesn't really flip my switches.  Recording artist and minister Jake Hamilton has a song that says "The King of Glory always comes at midnight..."  But why for crying out loud?  I wish I could explain it with a brilliance that would reflect an incredible pool of wisdom residing in me.  But I can't.  Such a pool does not exist.  Not in me anyway.  The only thing I know is that He is in control and that He promised. 

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't anxious.  Here we are less than than 24 hours before we are to leave and we remain about $5,000 short.  I keep throwing that anxiety back to Him (I Peter 5:7) but like mud on a wall it doesn't seem to stick very long.  So I wind up and throw it again!  And while I find myself on the edge of agitation with the whole thing, I know that He works all things to good and that many, many inner thoughts and yes, fears, have surfaced in me that without the pressure, would never get addressed.  Things like...

• Do I really trust or is my trust limited to things that if I fail its no big deal and the disappointments are small and easy to digest?
• Is my faith strong enough to head out to the mid-west state with only $200 in my account?  
• Is my faith in God or is it in others...or even worse, myself?  
• Does all this speaking the truth in love, declaring His word and clinging have an effect?
• Do the fervent prayers get heard?
• And then the granddaddy of them all...What if I missed it completely and am in the flesh?

These thoughts swirl in my head like a tornado over open land.  Its one thing to sing and sway in the comfortable confines of my home and church but what about when God calls you to step out of the boat and walk on the water?  

While I can't explain all the why's and what-abouts, I can say this:  there is a refuge and a hiding place just like David claimed there was (Ps 25:20; Ps 32:7).  It is found not in what you see but in that place in the soul that is occupied by Him.  It is He who has authored and finished the deal.  So in the midst of pressure, facing an unknown and uncertainty that is not years or months or even weeks away but is right here, right now...I can lift my hands and proclaim "Praise the LORD, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.  [He] who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's."  (Ps 103).

So we continue to wait for God to show up and show off.  I do as the old Native American prayer says, and Paul proclaims in Romans 12:9..."cling to that which is good".  So I hug Karen extra tight this morning and take a lesson from my younger children as they excitedly await our departure to meet their new brother and sister.  They aren't worried about a thing:  Dad's got it all under control!

Let me close today by saying that it now seems really appropriate that we introduced this entire adoption thing to others with Billy Joel's "You might be right, I might be crazy" playing in the background. 

But even in the tenseness of the moment I'd rather be found crazy attempting to walk on water at His beckoning, than be found sane in the "safety" of my own logic, playing it safe and living life only for myself!

Keep praying for us.  Until we talk again...