Monday, January 10, 2011

Congrats! to Chris and Jana!

We have been busily blogging about our journey of adopting, but there is more to our life than just our 4 new children.  A wonderful story has been unfolding in the life of our daughter, Jana.  To her we give a big shoutout this morning.  Why?  Because it finally happened for her.  She is officially engaged to be married!  Chris made it official last night with his own customized serenade just for Jana, followed by a proposal and ring.  While we knew in our hearts this was coming, the official announcement was sweet and special.  Chris is a wonderful young man who we welcome with open arms into the family.  But beyond the festive moment, their story is one that bares telling.  It is a testimony of God's sovereignty and kindness guiding 2 people through life until those lives managed to cross paths at the appointed time...the kind of stuff that make for wonderful "chick-flick" kinda movies!
 
Here's their story in a nutshell.  When just a young teen, Jana embraced the idea that she need not entangle herself with the standard routines of dating.  The idea of dating because everyone else is doing it or for whatever reason seemed credible on any particular day didn't appeal to her.  The idea of putting her heart out there to some pimple-faced kid (ok, ok, that's a father talking!) who would only squash it and then practice breaking up for some reason just didn't strike a cord.  Instead, Jana made a quality decision to guard her heart by placing it squarely in her Heavenly Father's hands.  There and only there, would her heart be safe as she waited for Him to bring her the man who would cherish it the same way that He has done for her all through her life.  Jana has waited patiently and God has finally brought that man into her life.
 
On the other hand, Chris also made the same quality decision to not date until he was ready to find his wife.  Unlike many teens, Chris made a decision to respect his parents, listen to their wisdom, and protect his heart as well.  Life ran its course, Chris waited patiently, involved himself in ministry, work and building strong, supportive relationships that would encourage him in his spiritual, emotional, vocational and mental growth.  In the process, Chris was able to focus on learning the lessons that would prepare him for this next season of life, mature as a young man, and serve others without the entanglement of "dead-end" relationships.  God has rewarded his decision with a beautiful young woman who loves him, God and will make him a wonderful help mate in life.
 
Some may look at Jana and Chris' path and question it, maybe even consider it "Old Fashion" or antiquated ideology.  To that I would say "poppycock!"  The truth is, there is not a one of us that doesn't wish that we had entered the wonderful bonds of matrimony minus the scars and bruises of prior relationships.  Again, the truth is, these 2 will enter their marriage without much of the baggage that most will carry entering the bonds of matrimony. 
 
In addition, the entire process of waiting has built character in Chris and Jana that will serve them well to make a successful marriage.  Think about it, what does waiting do for one's character?  Ok, first there's the ability to deny self and yield to another, in this case, yield to God's will and timing.  Second, relationship boundaries are developed.  I know that Jana had opportunity to date and see what guys were like had she chosen to do so.  But in not doing so, she established boundaries with men that will serve to protect her marriage in the future.  Same with Chris.  Third, Jana and Chris know what it is like to maintain joy while waiting for something you want.  Whether its a spouse, or a car or a house or a child, waiting can wear on your joy and peace.  The ability to maintain your joy in the midst of such wait is an incredible attribute to bring into a marriage.  Do you see how, in Chris and Jana's decision not to date until God sent their mate along, they have already built valuable skills into their relationship?  Anyone who's been married and is not psychotic would agree that some of the most important virtues that make marriage successful is the ability to defer to someone else, maintain boundaries in relationships outside the marriage, and release your joy and contentment while waiting for a desire to be fulfilled.  There are many more virtues developed but we'll stop here.
 
In closing, this part is for Jana and Chris.  I know Chris' parents would join Karen & I in saying that we are incredibly proud of you guys.  You did it right!  We know that God has a wonderful plan for your lives together and we look forward to watching it unfold...as well as grandbabies (in a couple of years)!  The two of you are wonderful example of trusting God and reaping the beautiful harvest of a "desire fulfilled is a tree of life".  We love you and pray God's continual blessing on your lives.

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