Eden Restored

Today is the 3rd day since we were forced to abandon our trip to the midwest to meet and bring home our new children.  We spent the first day just trying to figure out what just happened and the 2nd day trying to climb back on the horse!  We've now had a chance to rehearse things and a chance to regroup.  And the result?  Climb back on the horse and find a way!  I now want to share with you something from the prophet Ezekiel in chapter 36.  I think there's something here for us.
Ezekiel 36:33-38   Adonai Elohim says, “When the day comes...I will cause the cities to be inhabited and the ruins to be rebuilt.  The land that was desolate will be tilled, whereas formerly it lay desolate for all passing by to see.  Then they will say, “The land that used to be desolate has become like the Garden of Eden, and the cities formerly ruined, abandoned and wasted have been fortified and are inhabited!”  Then the nations around you that remain will know that I, Adonai, have rebuilt the ruins and replanted what was abandoned.  I, Adonai, have spoken; and I will do it!”  ...So will the ruined cities be filled with flocks of people. 
Whenever you feel that God has called you to follow Him and you accept that call, a strange journey will always follow...always!  Certainly Moses got more than he bargained for when the enemy pinned him in at the Red Sea.  Abraham must have been a bit dazed when God was asking him to offer up the promise of a great nation on the altar.  I'm quite sure that the disciples sat there the day of Jesus' crucifixion in something of a mental stupor, questioning the whole deal and wondering why they had given the last 3 years of their life for this outcome.  These are moments of desolation.  They lend themselves to feelings of total abandonment...much like when your stranded on the side of the road in an RV that won't run, 2 little children anticipating meeting their new family and the guy at the dealership says they have no other available replacements and you must cancel your trip!

But look what God says about such things.  At the end of ourselves a beautiful transformation happens.  Its a restoration of Eden.  Things that were ruined, hopes that were abandoned and things that have lost their energy will be inhabited and have new life breathed into them!  But this time its God's life not yours.  It was the Lord’s doing.  He's showing off and demonstrating His great love and compassion towards us.  He's causing the trees to yield fruit and the fields to increase their production, the grains to abound (vs. 29-30) and your sheep to increase (vs. 37)!

What is it that has been ruined in life?  What hopes have been abandoned and have wasted away in their lifeless energy?  The Lord has spoken 4 powerful words:  I WILL DO IT!  So we will go back to square one, await further instructions and abandon ourselves to faith & trust in Him all over again.  What we learned here is that when God calls you to something the most unfruitful question to ask along the journey is "why?" when along the way things don't go like you thought they should.  That one word only leads to an empty, vacuous silence.  The more productive question is "what now?"  It is from this place that you hear all over again the voice of God.

Until we speak again...be blessed!

Good things come to those that wait...

Don't you just hate that saying!  I don't know about you but waiting doesn't really flip my switches.  Recording artist and minister Jake Hamilton has a song that says "The King of Glory always comes at midnight..."  But why for crying out loud?  I wish I could explain it with a brilliance that would reflect an incredible pool of wisdom residing in me.  But I can't.  Such a pool does not exist.  Not in me anyway.  The only thing I know is that He is in control and that He promised. 

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't anxious.  Here we are less than than 24 hours before we are to leave and we remain about $5,000 short.  I keep throwing that anxiety back to Him (I Peter 5:7) but like mud on a wall it doesn't seem to stick very long.  So I wind up and throw it again!  And while I find myself on the edge of agitation with the whole thing, I know that He works all things to good and that many, many inner thoughts and yes, fears, have surfaced in me that without the pressure, would never get addressed.  Things like...

• Do I really trust or is my trust limited to things that if I fail its no big deal and the disappointments are small and easy to digest?
• Is my faith strong enough to head out to the mid-west state with only $200 in my account?  
• Is my faith in God or is it in others...or even worse, myself?  
• Does all this speaking the truth in love, declaring His word and clinging have an effect?
• Do the fervent prayers get heard?
• And then the granddaddy of them all...What if I missed it completely and am in the flesh?

These thoughts swirl in my head like a tornado over open land.  Its one thing to sing and sway in the comfortable confines of my home and church but what about when God calls you to step out of the boat and walk on the water?  

While I can't explain all the why's and what-abouts, I can say this:  there is a refuge and a hiding place just like David claimed there was (Ps 25:20; Ps 32:7).  It is found not in what you see but in that place in the soul that is occupied by Him.  It is He who has authored and finished the deal.  So in the midst of pressure, facing an unknown and uncertainty that is not years or months or even weeks away but is right here, right now...I can lift my hands and proclaim "Praise the LORD, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.  [He] who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's."  (Ps 103).

So we continue to wait for God to show up and show off.  I do as the old Native American prayer says, and Paul proclaims in Romans 12:9..."cling to that which is good".  So I hug Karen extra tight this morning and take a lesson from my younger children as they excitedly await our departure to meet their new brother and sister.  They aren't worried about a thing:  Dad's got it all under control!

Let me close today by saying that it now seems really appropriate that we introduced this entire adoption thing to others with Billy Joel's "You might be right, I might be crazy" playing in the background. 

But even in the tenseness of the moment I'd rather be found crazy attempting to walk on water at His beckoning, than be found sane in the "safety" of my own logic, playing it safe and living life only for myself!

Keep praying for us.  Until we talk again...

Smooth Sailing or Walking on Water?

Anyone who has followed our blog for awhile will know that it is no secret we have had struggles in our adoption process. some may even think we are crazy to do what we have done. There have been times that we might have agreed with you. However, when God calls you to do something it isn't always easy and it doesn't always work out like you planned. We have learned this over and over and all we can do is keep moving forward. We have also learned so much about God through this process and how much He loves us and is with us all the way through all the struggles.

As most of you know, in 2010 we adopted 3 severely neglected children, ages 2, 3 & 4 at the time.  It has been the ride of our life!...absolutely one of the most challenging things we've ever done and at the same time absolutely one of the most meaningful things God has ever asked us to do!

Our boys are flourishing now and just when we thought we had smooth sailing, God has again called us get out of the boat and provide a home for 2 special needs children, ages 2 & 3. There are prominent medical needs involved secondary to severe neglect, starvation and hypoxia (the 2 year old literally starved to death but was revived).  

The only piece of the puzzle left now is the funding.  At this time, we still need to raise $10,000.  We should be nervous but we're not!  We are confident that God is calling us and believe that He will provide. We are keeping our eyes on Jesus and walking on water to meet Him.

He asked were we willing? and we put our Yes! on the table. He has challenged us to abandon ourselves to faith & trust that the need would be met.  We are simply to put our need out there to various groups, churches and individuals.  We believe somewhere in this process is a miracle of provision on behalf of these 2 little children.  

We are asking you be a part of helping us raise these funds by praying for us, donating if you desire and sending this need on to others? We only have one week to do this!  

We should be nervous...but strangely we're not.  There is a deep overwhelming peace and excitement that somehow goes beyond our circumstances.  It is a special time.  Never before has our faith been so tested and so much "blind trust" required.  It is a strange feeling knowing that you're doing everything you can but understanding that no matter what we do its not enough.  We must have something bigger, something greater, something supernatural operating in order to give these 2 children the home they deserve.  And somehow we understand that this is not about us.  And Its not just about the 2 children getting a home.  There are others at stake here too.  We believe that others will not only participate in our adoption process and be blessed, but that still others will step up and say "well if the Thomas' can do it, we can do it too".  We know not everyone is called to adopt. We are all called to take care of widows and orphans. James 1:27 but that doesn't mean that everyone is called to parent an orphan. It may that be that you are called to help others adopt, or serve and support missions to orphans. There are so many ways to serve God and we all are in this together. It is to this end that we recognize that this is not our adoption.  It has the feel of something bigger than us.  I've always heard that everybody needs a "why" in life in order to motivate them.  Ours is coming into focus. 

We have 2 ways set up for people to get involved with these children's future. First, people can go to www.simplesolutions4.com and scroll down on the home page to the donate button.  Second, people can go to http://www.gofundme.com/air1K4 and donate. Both sites are secure. I'd like to thank you in advance for any help, prayers, donations and ask that you please pass this one to anyone that you may think is appropriate. 

Looking for Answers in the Easy Places

 

This morning I heard my wife comment in the other room followed by a couple of emails she forwarded to me.  Both were CNN breaking news feeds that read as follows:

The new search area for Flight 370 is hundreds of miles closer to the Australian coast, which will give planes more time to spend over the area, an Australian official says. Planes may also encounter better weather there than in the previous search area.

and

Aircraft first arrived at the new search area Friday, an Australian official said. So far, authorities have not found anything they would classify as debris, he said.

After reading the 2 emails,  It brought to mind the story about the boy who was frantically looking for something behind the family home.  It was late at night and the boy was down on all fours, brushing his hands back and forth in the grass and near the point of tears when his father came looking for him only to find him in their back yard. 

“What are you doing, son?” the father asked.

The boy replied, “I’m looking for my watch” to which the father inquired further, “Where did you last see it?”

“In the front yard!” he quickly responded.  Puzzled by his son’s response, the father ventured again, “Then why in the world are you looking in the backyard for the watch?”

Slightly annoyed and obviously distressed the boy responded without hesitation “Because that is where the light is!”

The CNN news search struck me as similar logic.  While I’m sure there is more to the story, it reads as if the search was moved to a new location because the weather was better there!  Of course the follow up news released indicated that the search team had come up empty! 

What really strikes me about this story is in the details.  How many times do we “look for answers in the easiest place to look”?  For example children...

Ø 

        Why do they continue to do the things we’ve asked them not to do even after we’ve preached this     sermon over a 1000 times? 

Ø  Why do they ask for the very thing that wasnt offered?  

Ø  Why do they lie about insignificant things? 

Ø  Why do they terrorize the other kids in sunday school?

Its easy to search in the comfortable places…

Ø  They’re oppositional…

Ø  they’re defiant,

Ø  they’re ungrateful,

Ø  they’re detached…

 

But searching for debris in the comfortable places doesn’t pay off very well.  The search must move to the uncomfortable places…in such places the search team is pushed to discover the truth.  The secrets of the soul are not easily discovered and healing is never found in the label.  It requires something of a sacrifice from the search team and in the case of a child’s heart parents are that search team.  And if we’re talking about children who have been grafted into the family it’s difficult to know where the plane went down!  The search begins with asking a different set of questions.  If it’s not defiance, then what is it?  If it’s not detachment, then what?  What is my child feeling when he abandons all logic and consequence to do his/her own thing?

Recently, I had an interesting meeting with a young man.  During our meeting he began to tell me that his father abandoned the family when he was 6.  Literally, his dad went to the grocery store and never came back!  The young man tearfully recounted what it was like for him and that he now can relate to kids because he “knows what it feels like”.  I stopped him at that point and asked a pointed question, “So what does it feel like?”

I sat there for a moment and as tears welled up in his eyes.  He then looked me in the eyes and said “FEAR!  I was all alone and figured that I had to take care of myself…nobody was going to be there for me!” 

What had been an academic-like meeting suddenly became a sobering moment filled with emotion, as I got a glimpse of the injury in his soul.  His story represents the heart of too many teens and children who carry the burden of their own survival.  We get caught up on the opposition and disobedience because after all, the weather is safer there.  To search elsewhere requires that we fly headlong into the storm while suspending our need for comfort and/or realize that our intense desire for reciprocal love may not be realized…at least not right now.  The search requires that we keep trying to attach with no guarantees that it will ever happen. 

Granted, it is easier to search where the weather is good.  Otherwise I am forced to admit that this unconditional love thing is very hard.  I am confronted with the reality that on my own, I am inept at this “laying down my life thing” in order for my child to thrive and feel the warm embrace and security of love. 

So how do you look in the right places even though the weather there is terrible, maybe even treacherous?  I know of only one model for doing so.  Its found in these words, “Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, who…made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant…He humbled Himself and became obedient…” (Phillipians 2:5-8).  The model also teaches that “while we were yet sinners, He died for us”…which translated means that while we were doing all that crazy stuff to try to hide our fears, He still loved!  And there’s the model.  The denial of one’s own self in order that others may prosper.  It’s the right place to search.  Its not as comfortable as where blue skies prevail or street lights shine into a frightening darkness…but then there are no plane parts or watches to be found in those places and there are no children to be saved from their fears there either.

Understanding Adoptive Parents

As we have previously written, our experience parenting children that we have adopted has brought with it many surprises, challenges and yes, its bizarre moments!  

One of the things that we’ve noticed over the past few years is how the entire adoptive experience has had an isolating effect on us.  If we would have had a nickel for every time we’ve looked at each other and said, “they [meaning friends and even family] just don’t understand” our financial status would be dramatically altered!  

One thing we admit is that it is hard to talk to about these things.  There have been those who tried.  It often feels like others are wondering if we’ve lost our minds, not to mention our parental touch.  Attempts by those around us to help us out by saying something that they think is either instructive or inspirational often seem shallow or even worse, judgmental and condemning.  Admittedly, it’s a tough line to walk.  I’m not sure I could say something all that wise to me if I were in my friends’ shoes! 

So that’s why we’re posting these links!  We came across several other blogs recently that say it all and to be honest really make us feel like we are not alone and there are people out there that do understand. There really are people out there that are living the life we are living to some degree or another. We are thankful for these posts that have encouraged us and spoken to our heart. We hope you will enjoy them as well.

This blog tells it all, exactly what we feel and experience daily. We are not saints but Warriors fighting for these children and all children who need homes and families. Please click on the following link: http://sherific.blogspot.com/2013/11/adoption-month.html?m=1

This blog explains so much truth about special needs adoption and although our boys are not diagnosed with any physical special needs they do, in fact, have very special needs. The impact of loss, abandonment and neglect took its toll on our boys and the result is that our family has a very difficult time doing even simple, perfunctory activities like driving 30 minutes to eat out or an hour and a half to visit family. Such routine events result in chaos, destruction of property and frustration that even Mother Teresa would have a difficult time managing! The result is a feeling of isolation and even though this has been one of the hardest things we have ever done, we wouldn't change a thing. It has also been one of the most rewarding things we have done and in spite of our struggles we feel totally blessed to have our boys. Please click on the following link: http://www.ellenstumbo.com/are-special-needs-families-isolated-by-erin-loraine/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+EllenStumbo+%28Ellen+Stumbo%29

This blog offers a nice mix of humor and truth.  It is a list of the 10 things that you don’t say to adoptive parents.  Please click on the following link: http://africatoamerica.org/2014/01/24/ten-things-not-to-say-to-adoptive-parents/.  My favorite part was the 7 things to say to an adoptive parent. So true and encouraging. Lets all try to say some of these things to the families you know that are adopting or have adopted.

We are truly not offended by others attempts to encourage us.  In fact, we’ve said a lot of the same things to others too.  We recognize that ours is a unique and difficult situation and we are eternally grateful for friends and family like you that have stood with us and encouraged us!  With that said, enjoy and we’ll talk again soon…

Taking Care of What Has Been Given to You: Parenting Adult Children

I pray for them. I do not pray for the world

but for those whom You have given Me, for they are Yours.

While I was with them in the world, I kept them in Your name.

Those whom You gave Me I have kept; and none of them is lost

 

 John 17:9,12

 

Our Warrior Arrows blog was created to talk about our experience with adoption and parenting our adopted children. But as time has gone by and the boys are assimilating into our family and hearts, we find ourselves speaking more as simply parents.  The past 2 and a half years with our “grafted” sons have been the experience of a lifetime.  On one hand its the most difficult thing we’ve ever done, while on the other, its one of the most meaningful things we’ve ever done in life. But today, we write about our other children.  The ones that are now adults.  We want to share some of our heart as parents of adult children.    

The article begins as an afterthought to a recent conversation I had with a colleague at work about our experience as fathers.  The crux of his comments was something along the lines of when his children were young he felt the responsibility of fatherhood, but now that they are adults, he can relax and be more of a spectator in their lives.  I responded that “to my adult children, I feel more responsibility now than ever to parent them”!  I went on to explain that I felt more responsibility to make good decisions in life in order that my children may have a good path to follow and that someday, they will inherit not only an estate, but a legacy of decision making they observed in every one of mine and Karen’s deeds, enterprises and relationships in life.  I spoke of how some of my older children are currently facing health challenges, financial pressures and career choices, and how, as a parents, we bear every single one of our children’s challenges in life. While my colleague smiled and agreed with me, the look on his face said otherwise.  I’m not sure that he understood what I was saying.  Perhaps I can explain now what its like for Karen & I to parent adult children.

You see, its easy to have faith when everyone has perfect health.  Its easy to preach The Blessing of Deuteronomy 28, i.e., “God will grant you abundant prosperity…” when you have a good, well-paying job.  And its easy to worship when your young children are living safely in your shadows.  But now, as adult children, they have grown up problems.  You know what they are because you’ve been there.  The game has changed.  God is more than a concept or a mystical being conjured up to somehow pacify your fears when the lightning cracks next to the bedroom window in the midst of a fierce thunder storm.  This is real life and we knew how tough it could be at times.  We worked hard at creating a culture at home that sheltered our kids from the harsher parts of life.  But it’s time.  Their time!  Like my friend, we wish it was as easy as “well now they are 18 and on their own and I’ve done my part …” as if this inevitable life maturation somehow absolves us of any further parental responsibilities.  But its not that easy.  Not for us anyway.  We want to fix everything.  That’s what we do in life.  That’s what parents do.  Fix it…Kiss it…there, its all better and life is good again!   However, life is now chiseling out its next champion of faith and we have different roles.  Not less important or free from responsibility, but different. 

The different role contains several desires.  There is a desire to continue to protect our children.  We still don’t want them hanging out with questionable characters and the desire to clean off skinned knees doesn’t subside.  I suspect this desire to protect your children is the root cause of many an adult child and parental conflict, i.e., parents trying to control how their children will live their lives.  It’s a delicate balance between constructive input and destructive denial of their adult responsibility to choose a meaningful path.

Then there is a desire to fix our children’s lives, particularly the parts that are a source of distress or pain for them. It’s a real struggle for a parent when an adult child becomes sick or they are laid off from their job or they can’t find a way to get to their next step in life.  The parental impulse is to jump in and fix it but its more like running a race with your feet tied together!  Make the greasy haired, foul-mouthed, agnostic, mess of a kid stay away from your teenage son or daughter!  But now the rules are different.  Different because the greasy haired agnostic grew up, became an atheist and is your son’s supervisor!  The situation is more complex and requires a different response from you as a parent.  Its not just “go away” or “because I said so” or “hey, I pay the bills around here”.  No.  This requires a more sophisticated form of protection that is firmly based in life principles, core values, and Godly wisdom.  It is the response of a seasoned parent.

Finally, the role of parenting adult children is characterized by friendship.  There I said it.  We want to be our children’s best friends.  We want them to trust our counsel.  We want them to have confidence in our life decisions.  We want them to maintain that “my dad can fix anything” and “mom always knows best” attitude even though such a thought is laughable and irrational.

How the Trinity works is a bit of a mystery to me.  I get the basic idea and Jesus certainly expressed more than once that He and the Father where One.  As such, Jesus knew the heart of a parent.  The words found in John 17 are an example.  The words express what its like to be the parents of an adult child.  Paraphrased, Jesus was saying that He looked after them right up to the end; that those given into His care continued in His care beyond the crib, beyond toddlerhood and adolescence and into full maturation as adult believers.  You can feel both His connection and sense of responsibility that He feels when He says:  those whom You have given me, not one of them is lost!  This, my friends, is the heart of a parent! It doesn’t stop when they stop living under your roof, but rather, when you breath your last.  And at that moment the pride of every parent is to say the same thing that Jesus said:  Father, I’m coming home.  I took care of those that You gave me right up to the very end…and not one of them is lost!

Until we speak again, look after the ones that He has given you and count yourself among the most fortunate to do so…

Sibling Rivalry

So this morning I'm minding my own business, enjoying a little quiet time and reading from the Good Book when I come across a scripture in John 21 that makes me laugh.  Now I don't often see scripture as a discourse in comedy, but I couldn't help myself this morning.  The dynamic was all too familiar.  This exchange records the 3rd time He has appeared to someone since His resurrection from the dead.  He is having a nice little conversation with Peter on the seashore.  Just the 2 of them strolling down the coastline enjoying a special little one-on-one friendship time that Peter must have found infinitely rewarding when he notices something.  "The disciple whom Jesus loved" is following along behind them.  Its a real Raymond and Robert moment if you know what I mean (think Everybody Loves Raymond).

Now understand that Jesus had just encouraged Peter to take the lead, me "the man", feed the sheep, garner the troops...well, you get the idea.  But when Peter catches a glimpse of this disciple... whom Jesus loved...following along looking all the world like he was trying to crowd in on his private time with the risen Savior, he can't help himself.  Peter knows better than to question the disciple's right to be there or on a more primative level, even exist.  After all, he had seen Jesus in action and was aware that one of His most defining mantras was "let them come".  So in that moment, filled with what I suspect was irritation, Peter blurts out, "Well what about this guy, Jesus?  What's in it for him?"  (paraphrased by me...you might want to read it for yourself at John 21:21!).  I close my eyes and hear the words of Robert as he concedes in his dejection, "everybody loves Raymond"!  

And Jesus' reply?  

"If I want him to live to remain until I come, what is that to you?"  I think another translation here would be something like:  "Whatever Peter!  If I say he lives until I come back, that's nunya!... none-of-your-business!"  

It was a classical moment!  A vintage sibling rivalry moment!  It struck me as funny because we've had this same moment with our boys...so, so many times!

• “Don’t worry about what your brother is wearing!  Just worry about what you have on!"
• “Don’t worry about what your brother got for his birthday!  You play with your toys and be happy for him!”
• “Don’t worry about what he’s got on his plate!  You eat what’s on yours!”  
• "You are not your brother's keeper.  Just mind your own business!"
• "What is that to you if he got a piggyback ride!"

I suppose that foolishness is bound in the heart of a child and only through considerable effort and discipline is it tamed. Jesus had to deal with it and so have we…hundreds of times!  Its immature, its misguided, its aggravating and its selfishness in its rawest form…but its life and intricately wound up in the heart of a boy or girl, man or woman.  Its called, “who’s getting what?” and “hey, I got the short end of the stick!”  Its more that just petty jealousy or simple selfishness. The issue stems from a fear that I will not have what I need and an anxiety that I will not be taken care of.  It is a basic question that each of us must answer:  do we really believe that our Father in Heaven will provide for us, on a personal, intimate level, what we need and do so in abundance as He promised to do? (see Jesus' other words earlier in the book of John, chapter 10 verse 10).  

The good news is that our boys are learning and so do we as sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father.  So until we talk again...hey Lord, I saw a brand new BMW in front of John's house...!

Memorandum of Understanding©

While praying for America last fall, I had a bit of a "moment" if you will.  I suppose that I am one of the more fortunate people in that I had a good relationship with my father.  While not perfect, I knew he was invested in my life.  My relationship with my earthly father made it easy to believe in a Heavenly Father who is invested in my life.  But not just me, His investment extends to all mankind and particularly to this country.  For a moment, I saw a Father's heart.  I quickly moved to write it down at that time.  Now I'd like to share that moment.  

Memorandum of Understanding©

M. Russell Thomas, PhD

“Excuse me, Liberty, could you step into my office for a minute”.  I heard the Father’s voice as I hurriedly rushed down Gold Street heading for Cloud 268.  I was in a hurry for a meeting with the East Wing Angels Association but had come to understand that an opportunity to spend a little time with Father must be seized, for in that time refreshment and revelation for the soul follow.

But today Father was in a solemn mood.  All business as He gazed out over all His creation.  If I didn’t know any better I would say that he had been crying.  His eyes were swollen and ruddy although never failing to communicate a deep, piercing compassion that melts the deepest of fear and worry.

“Yes sir.  What can I do for you today, Father?” I asked as I stood in the large, ornate doorway of Father’s inner chamber.

“Please get your laptop.  Sit down.  I’d like to dictate a memo and need your help”, Father said in a rather businesslike fashion.

I quickly skirted down to my office and retrieve my small computer before returning to Father’s office.  He offered the seat at His large, cedar desk while He stood looking out over all of His creation.  His eyes peered on a particular land just off the horizon and west of the Jasper Gate.  It was a land I knew well:  America.

“Remember when I assigned you to America, Liberty?” Father asked with a notable tone of concern in His voice?

“Yes, I do Father!  You said they needed a little of me, ah, Liberty that is.  I was pleased to help them find their freedom”, I replied.

“Take this down, Liberty” Father launched right in to executive mode. “A Memorandum of Understanding.  Put it in Memo form from me.  To: America.  RE:  A Recent Misunderstanding.”

“Got it sir,” I quickly replied.

“Dear America.  It has recently come to my attention that some of My prophets, teachers, evangelists, apostles and pastors are spreading the word that I am angry with you. These same department leaders have cited the senseless shootings, a rash of wild fires, and economic calamities in America as evidence of my anger and displeasure with you.  Furthermore, these same department leaders have been forecasting a barrage of Heavenly judgments on America.  I’ve heard everything from Hurricanes to earthquakes to famines to biological calamities. 

I am writing to set the record straight.  NONE OF THIS IS THE TRUTH!” 

“Um, put that in big, bold letters, Liberty”, Father said as He repeated himself…NONE OF THIS IS THE TRUTH!

“What I would like to say to you, America is this”. 

“And emphasize these words for me, Liberty”, Father spoke as a side note to His missive. 

“Please do not mistake my anger that you think burns against you, for my love that burns for you!”

“You see America, I remember when we first started our relationship.  How you sought my advice and how I sent Liberty to you in your quest to be free from the bondage of tyranny.  The whole Tea Party thing in Boston was a hoot and I remember how we sat for hours together fashioning your Constitution.  And that Declaration of Independence was ‘Divinely’ crafted if I may so say myself!  I remember how we rode off into the Wild West together to settle unchartered territories and rope a few Doggies together.  How you rose up to my call to drive Hitler back from destroying innocent lives.  I have always been impressed with you, America and the way that you’ve supported My people, Israel.  How you’ve poured out of your resources to help the poor and needy around the world and were the first to arrive on the scene in Sri Lanka after the Tsunami.  America it has made me proud every time you’ve hollowed out the words “with Liberty and Justice for all”, for I have always loved those precepts.  I remember when you trusted me for all your needs and how you honored me when you decided to put the words, “IN GOD WE TRUST” on your money.  Yes, while it is true that our relationship has been strained of late and that it did hurt my feelings when you no longer wanted Me in your children’s classroom or when you wanted to take down My commandments in your buildings and as you have taken the lives of your young in the name of choice, I want you to know that there is absolutely no desire on My part to pass judgment on you now”.

Father stopped.  I waited while He turned to look back out towards the west.  I could see His Adam’s apple flutter violently in his throat as He fought back the tears.  In a few minutes Father regained His composure enough to utter a few last words and with a quivering voice said,… “America, all I want is for you to come back to me again.”

Good Health Naturally!

Today's post is a little different. We wanted to draw attention to and explain the links to other sites on the side of our blog. You will see several other sites listed. Two are for other blogs we write that focus on our other interests. One for Faith and Finance and one for Party ideas. Two links are for Health products that we firmly believe in. So much so that we have joined the companies and built a  business with them. This is our story with those companies.

In 2000, Karen had just had our fifth child and was tired all the time. Naptime was not just for the baby, Karen had to rest daily too. We knew we needed more energy and better health. We took vitamins but we never felt any difference from any of the pill form vitamins we took and we tried a lot of them. We were constantly looking for something that would be good for  us and give us the energy we so needed. In fact we looked and tried products for 2 years before we found the best supplements on the planet and knew we had found the ones that really work.

A friend of ours, who happens to be a world reknown nutritionist introduced us to the Biometics products. They are liquid nutritional supplements and the only ones that are Micellized for maximum absorption and results. We knew immediately that these products were different.  We immediately felt the difference! They taste great and you can feel the energy go all through your body as you drink them.  2002 began our lifelong relationship with the products and the company.

Since being on the products we have many stories of results to share and those stories built a business for us that is still growing. Joint pain-gone, blood pressure lowered, energy levels raised, never being sick, rashes and allergies cleared up. As we got personal results we also learned more about nutrition and health and that if we give our bodies what it needs it will heal and repair itself. This led to seeing results with friends, family, neighbors and even clients. ADHD improved. Behavior issues improved, Autism improved.

As a psychologist, Russell was captured with the results that ADHD children (and adults) were reporting as a result of a unique blend of the Biometics products.  He started recommending the products to some of his patients and coaching them using the products.  The results were more than impressive.  After several years of seeing result after result, Russell felt that he needed to share his experiences working with the products and ADHD in written form.  In 2008 he published Turbo Charged Childhood and has continued to work with families and their children, combining traditional counseling with a unique blend of liquid nutritional supplements.

When we first brought our adopted children home, they were malnourished and sickly. We began giving them Biometics and they began to heal. One of our sons had chronic ear infections and had been on and off antibiotics his whole life. Another was born premature and was still using a respirator. Within weeks, the premature son no longer needed his respirator and both responded incredibly to the Biometics products with drastically improved health.  No more antibiotics.  No more respirators.  All are growing stronger everyday!

The other link is for Essential Oils from Young Living. We just recently found these products and have been equally impressed in just a short time. We believe in taking care of our bodies and using natural resources to heal and help with everyday issues. In using these products we have been able to stay healthy and off of medication.  We have experienced relief from headaches, toothaches, back & neck pain, sore muscles, and eczema.  The oils have a lovely aroma that is both soothing and relaxing, generating a calming effect in your home.  The are also effective in promoting a good nights sleep!

We love natural results and healthy lives. We love to share our results with others and help them get the same great results we have gotten. We love learning more and more about healing the way God intended it. Please feel free to click on the links and try our products. We would love to hear from you and help you navigate your health and healing as well.

Our journey down the health path has been exciting and we have shared our experiences and results many times in a variety of venues.  As a result, we have developed a variety of training opportunities including on site seminars/ workshops, webinars, and phone consultations.  If you, your church group, or support group are interested in having us speak at your event or simply have questions, please feel free to contact us.  We would be honored to share with you what we have discovered for ourselves over the past 10+ years!

Boys!

Raising boys is one of the greatest experiences one can have in life. Boys are full of energy, mischief, curiosity and LOVE! Who can resist a sweet, innocent boy, who may happen to be covered in mud at any given time?

They are also very responsible and love to learn to do lifeskills...that is, when they're not doing dog piles!

We raised three of our own. They are each 9 years apart but when they get together they become one age and enjoy each other and doing things together. Like wrestling, fishing, camping, and cooking. What fun to have cooking throw downs with these boys! Family gatherings make for great memories and awesome food.

We had so much fun and love with the first 3 so we couldn't resist and adopted 3 more boys!  These three are each one year apart. WOW! It is like having triplets, but oh so fun...and never a dull moment!  We also have four wonderful girls and I don't mean to leave them out but this post is about boys so there will be another time to show off the girls.

That leaves us with 4 boys at home and the boy fun is full and alive in our house.  Whether its playing outside, crawling on dad's tractor...or lap...

or hanging from trees, working in the garden, conquering universes with their Star Wars light sabers,

swinging from tires,

or enjoying ice cream

never mind the chocolate on the white shirts!

cause its time for another dog pile!

there's enough love to go around as these little guys figure out life on the farm

and life in a new family with older brothers...

In the end, here we are!  All 13 of us...and counting, our oldest son and his wife are pregnant

...with a BOY!  (we think!)

There is no question about it, boys are a special breed.  Their natural combination of curiosity, endless energy,  and downright cuteness are irresistible and have brought much joy and life to our home through the years.  We strongly recommend giving thanks for and hugs to the boys in your life today!

Managing your own need.

Today brought an interesting devotion from the book of Proverbs.  In the 25th Chapter, Solomon, the man credited with being the wisest man to ever live said these words:

 

It is not good to eat much honey;

So to seek one’s own glory is not glory [at all].

Whoever has no rule over his own spirit

Is like a city broken down, without walls.

 

One of the devasting effects of parental neglect is the development of narcissism.  Psychoanalysist, Heinz Kohut, once spoke much about the development of narcissism.  He concluded that everybody has a narcissistic need and that in normal development these needs are met through empathic parenting.  Primarily through empathy, children develop the skill of self soothing, feeling safe, receive nurturing and develop a sense of well-being in this world.  Without such parenting, narcissism basically goes unchecked, rules the day, and establishes an abyss of emotional need that demands satisfaction, i.e., its all about me, baby!   Those around such a person often avoid contact, run for the exit doors or tend to counter the self-centeredness with rejection and in worse cases, become abusive in efforts to "tame" the narcissistic demands.

 

Kohut's theory never made more sense to me than now.  We have seen first hand the emotional injuries of neglect and the resultant narcissism.  It is one of the more difficult aspects of parenting children who have been neglected.  Watching a child try to meet legitimate needs through narcissistic indulgence is painstakingly difficult and managing your own reactions is tricky.  If you're not careful everyone loses.  The child makes no progress in learning to meet his/her needs and the parents have just either avoided or scolded the child for their demanding behavior...thus, to seek one’s own glory is not glory [at all].    Solomon said it centuries ago.  But he also tips us on how to meet those needs.  It requires that you gain control over your spirit.  We’re talking personal responsibility not only for making good choices, but for meeting one’s own needs in legitimate, healthy ways.  To not do so leaves you without defense or protection, just as a city without walls is subject to invasion.  When you are seeking your own glory, the possibility that you will be met with invaders is increased, resulting not in needs being met, but legitimate needs being plundered and even exploited.   This explains why people who are sensitive to rejection seem to invite that rejection from others.  Seeking your own glory opens up your soul like a broken down city without walls.  You get whatever wanders up and enters in.  Perhaps the sojourner is good for the city, perhaps he is not.  Maybe the need is met, maybe the soul and emotions were exploited and frustrated one more time.  However, the one who rules over his or her own spirit is not so.  They let in what they know will be good for the city!

 

But then the question comes, "exactly how to do teach a child to rule over his own spirit?"  Particularly a child that has experienced such disappointment and whose sense of well-being has been shaken to the core.  To that we say, "stay tuned, we'll get back to you on that one!"  We know it has to do with consistency, emphasizing personal responsibility from each child, the importance of the truth, unconditional love from parents and establishing meaningful relationships.  Perhaps it requires other things as well.  If you've got an idea, let us hear from you!  We'd welcome the input!  Until next time...